Bad Girl

Was very bad this evening! Was going great until my boss said she was making me some potatoes, as she was cooking for everyone else, for dinner which means I had to cook myself some chicken or I would look totally weird just having a few potatoes on a plate. It then went from bad to worse with M's Dad making a chocolate cake and serving me up a piece with fucking ice-cream! I was prepared for the potatoes and was luckily serving up which means I got to choose the tiniest ones which were like 1 bite each :) but then the cake as soon as he put it down in front of me I got up and filled my glass of water and knew it would have to come back up. Guzzled the water and refilled and went and ate the cake, it was sooo good! I thought as long as I'm going to throw it up I will just have another piece, so three pieces of cake later, a small bowl of ice-cream, 1/4 chicken breast and 4 tiny potatoes I'm in the bathroom getting rid of it all. Just to make sure I have just taken some laxatives.

So much for being good every day this week and seeing if I can loose a decent amount again. God I'm such a fucking failure!

In other news I did a completely crazy thing today. It's my sister engagement party in May and obviously me being in London and them all being back in Australia I wouldn't be able to go but with the encouragement of my boss who says I'm young it's my job to do crazy things like this I've booked a flight home for the weekend! Yes I am flying 26ish hours to spend two days at home and then fly all the way back! :/  So excited about surprising everyone, not about sitting up right for 26+ hours in economy, I'm trying to upgrade myself with my frequent flyer points but it says there are not seats available try closer to the time.

With 7 weeks until the party I really have to be good! I have to resist this left over chocolate cake tomorrow!

Spoke to my mum this morning. It really is amazing the different reactions you get to weight loss when people don't know your history. Over here it is oh well done, I wish I was strong like you, keep going etc etc. Told my mum this morning I had lost 2.2kg for this week she was like, you shouldn't be loosing weight that fast, what are you doing? are you eating? please don't be doing anything stupid, you should email your dr blah blah blah. I felt like saying I did email my dr she doesn't bloody reply.

Anywho very long post but with that I'm off to bed.